Graduates, you’re probably asking yourself some big, important questions right now on this important day, like how am I going to make a living? Will I ever have a mattress as nice as the one I had in the Forty? Will I ever again experience the magic of free Uber rides?
And the biggest question of all, after Chancellor Wrighton retires, will he still wear double-breasted suits? I’m going to say yes to that one.
Today, you’ll have to say farewell to many of the things that served as your support system and that got you through these stressful times, like Ted Drewes, toasted ravs, John’s Donuts, gooey butter cake. Thank goodness, WashU has also one of the world’s best medical centers.
Now, before I go any further, let me take a moment to congratulate another group who is here today and does deserve a lot of credit, and I’m talking about your parents and your family. What about a nice round of applause for them?
They’re out there beaming, not even thinking about the cost of tuition, and I’m sure they are just thrilled that some of you will be moving back into their basements.
Wherever you’re headed in the days and months ahead, I want to leave you with some food for thought, so let me turn to the real message of my speech.
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